Often times our definition of so called success is unconsciously defined and created for us by the media, our friends, our families, society and the environment that we live in. There can be certain expectations on each one of us to have achieved certain things in our lives in order to be considered successful. These things can be to have a wife/husband, a good job with a certain status, a house in a particular area, a certain type of car, a particular amount of income etc. In our current society our level of success is often measured by how we appear on the outside rather than how we feel on the inside.
Our measure of success or what we consider to be a success in life is taught to us from an early age. Much of the conditioning we receive when growing up with those around us, can create the beliefs and the framework for our standards of success in our lives. Sometimes these so called standards/expectations can be unrealistic and we can end up in a place of feeling unhappy and dissatisfied with our lives and ourselves.
When we choose to measure our level of success with other people, it can stop us from feeling the happiness, the joy and the satisfaction we experience from achieving something in our lives. For example if we look at Facebook and see people living a more so called ‘successful life’ than ourselves, it can be a recipe for unhappiness. The only person who is stopping us from feeling successful right now is ourselves. If we choose not to feel good for where we are right now in our current circumstances, whatever they maybe, we are making it harder for ourselves to feel successful and to feel happy. If we choose not to listen and trust our hearts, it will nearly be impossible to feel successful because we are not being true to ourselves.
In the world that we live in, if we choose to adopt and use somebody else’s measure of success, we are more than likely going to be unhappy. We will never feel fully satisfied and contented in our lives. A lot of the stress and pressure in our lives can be a result of having an unrealistic measure of success for ourselves. We may feel they we are never really living for ourselves but living for the approval, acceptance and praise of other people.
When we choose to have our own measure of success, we feel they we are being true to ourselves. We feel that we are living for ourselves and that we are creating our lives based on our own approval, acceptance and praise. We feel happiness and joy in our lives because we are following our heart’a desire. We feel more contented and peaceful in our lives.
Here are a few ways that I have come up with in regards to how we can create our own measure of success;
* Create your goals so that they are in alignment with your own values.
* Have realistic and achievable goals which feel good and true for you.
* Ask yourself what does it mean for me to be successful in my life?
* Become aware of your current measure of success and see if this really feels true for you.
* Say to yourself that the greatest measure of success is your own joy and happiness.
As always I would love to hear any feedback, words of wisdom or comments you may have.